You can do it at a trot. You can do it at a gallop.

I swear I never felt my heart palpitate though.

Yes, yesterday was our exciting annual trip to the Western Washington State Fair, AKA "The Puyallup." Scottland's digital camera is still broken so alas, I will not be able to deluge you with pictures of cute chickens, bunnies, horses, etc. Here are some highlights of the day's events:

*My inability to say "Pumpkin Spice Latte." Rather, I invariably refer to this drink as a "Punken Lahken." Needless to say, the barista at whatever Starbucks I'm at always get terribly confused about what I want. Why do I call it a Punken Lahken? It's all Rachael Eaton's fault. She called it that by accident in 2005 when ordering them for that year's crop of fairgoers and the name has just stuck.

*Rachael's retelling of the dream she had the night before. I can't repeat its contents here (without first getting her permission and clearing the room of children) but I promise to describe it to anyone that asks. Seriously. You have to ask. SERIOUSLY. It involves Ricky Schroeder in a butler outfit.

*In other Rachael induced hilarity, she bemoaned Shakira's "My Hips Don't Lie" song being stuck in her head on account of something her husband Scott had said to her earlier that morning. Needless to say, in a manner similar to the constant referencing of her nethers during the Port Townsend trip, every fifteen minutes or so I was either telling Scott and Scottland that Rachael's hips did not in fact lie or was asking her if perchance her hips were currently telling a lie.

*I finally got around to getting Stromboli chipped when she went into have her teeth cleaned earlier this month. Having done this, I picked up a collar for her fancy new tag on Monday. It's a cute little orange thing with very 60's looking flowers on it. It doesn't really fit her personality or the color of her coat though. So, I told Scottland that as soon as I found a black collar with skulls on it, I'd be switching it out. I found said collar in one of the craft booths at the fair and needless to say, Stromboli looks mighty fierce.

*The main exhibition hall, or Slice & Dice as we call it, was pretty cool. Lot's of lame booths for magnetic pain relieving bracelets, UV teeth bleaching stations and free back alignment tests. Lot's of cool booths though. I bought myself a new leather wallet and saw lot's of other things I would have bought if I didn't already have a pretty big backlog of geegaws I still need to find a home for. I did find a booth that was selling quick disconnects for garden hoses, which oddly enough I was recently wishing I had.

*The dizzy pass that lets us get onto as many of the fair rides as we wanted for a flat fee of 25 dollars paid off handsomely. We got onto pretty much every ride we wanted to at least once and even got to try out the fancy new haunted house ride. Imagine! A haunted house at a fair that isn't full of broken crap and mostly dark because most of the lights are burned out. I wasn't able to fit into one of the ride though, and I swear it mostly was because I was too tall. And yes, a little too wide.

*While on the Scrambler, Scottland and I spied a middle aged woman wearing what can only be described as a "Zeebrero." Basically, imagine a sombrero that's been decorated with faux zebra fur.

*We watched a bit of the Mutton Bustin World Championships. What's that? Well, imagine bullriding but for five years old. Yes, they strap children to the backs of sheep and let them loose. It's pretty crazy and very very cute.

*I picked up the coolest Marvin the Martian decal that I'll be attaching to the back window of the Tundra once it's back from having it's "cats" fixed/replaced.

*After leaving the fair, some guy approached Scott and offered to buy his dizzy pass for two dollars. Rachael subsequently offered to give him hers for free. He then pulls out a switchblade, grabs her hand and cuts the dizzy pass off her wrist. He then realizes that Rachael is freaked out by this and apologizes for scaring her. Neither myself, Scott or Scottland see this happen. Weird.

Anyhow, that this year's 2007 Puyallup. We managed to avoid too much crabiness. No one was sick or recovering from surgery and Scottland and I didn't have to sit through homophobic comments from a Jim Beam sales rep. All in all I'd say it was a good experience. Can't wait for next year! Yee Hah!!